It’s unlikely that sitting down for a 5-minute meditation today will yield life-changing results for you.
But, if you sustain your practice over time, you can experience meaningful changes in your life — both in terms of your subjective experience as well as the measurable activity going on inside your brain.
A lot of us struggle, however, to make self-reflective practices (such as meditation or using Open Dialogue) a daily habit.
We start and then stop.
… and then stop again.
But there is a framework for understanding why this happens, and how to work with your own…
Meditation has become mainstream. And with that, it’s been productized and commercialized.
With so many different methods and techniques, it’s no wonder people get confused and often doubt whether their way is the “right” way to meditate.
My goal in writing this article is to resolve many of the common misunderstandings people have about meditation. I want to point you towards your own genuine understanding of what meditation actually is.
It’s a long read! But it will be worth it.
This can be a powerful catalyst for your own meditation practice, and therefor your personal growth.
Earlier in my career I was embroiled in an inner conflict.
I felt that I was being underpaid and taken for granted at times. It was difficult to communicate with my boss and deep down I felt unfulfilled in my job.
I was unsure what to do about it all. And I was getting frustrated.
Sometimes I felt angry, impatient, jealous, negative, rebellious, stubborn, and exhausted. Sometimes even vindictive and hostile.
This constellation of emotions was completely of alignment with who I wanted to be. And yet I couldn’t help myself, it seemed, from feeling that way.
I thought a…
Sometimes when I’m feeling stuck or overwhelmed, I search for guidance by writing to someone I respect. In many cases I never send the message. It’s simply an exercise to help clarify things for myself.
I write to past mentors, coaches and therapists.
I write to authors, philosophers and other famous people I’ve never met.
When I write, I focus on explaining myself as honestly and straightforwardly as I can. I realize that if someone I respect were to read this, they would be offering valuable time and attention to me.
So I aim for the heart of my issue…
To Whomever it may interest and inspire,
Don’t hold back because you are waiting for perfection.
I know that you feel you owe it to him/her/the world, but whatever you are holding back needs to be expressed and exercised in order to become fully realized.
The greatest things must be tested in the fires and winds of the world. Some will burn up and evaporate, others will be honed and will accumulate.
Nothing, however, will be wasted.
So where are you holding back in your life?
I hold back Love in my relationships if I’m afraid that I don’t know…
There have been times when I was making a lot of money… and times when I was living entirely off of my Craigslist income.
One time I made $20 selling an electronic home pedicure kit that my mom had given to me (I used it once and then realized I would rather have cracked feet than risk electrocuting myself!).
Seriously, though, money was that one aspect of “reality” that I constantly used as a filter for my decisions. No matter how big or small, if it involved money I felt uncomfortable, insecure and limited.
When I started my first business…
The situation with COVID-19 is rapidly evolving, and we are all being advised to practice “Social Distancing” – the most effective way (at this point in time) to keep the coronavirus epidemic at bay, while giving the virus less chances of spreading.
But this doesn’t mean we have to retreat in fear.
Instead, we can see this as an opportunity to slow down and reconnect with what’s most important, so that we can move forward with greater clarity and intention.
Here are some constructive things you can do during this time…
With infinite information at our fingertips, it’s challenging not…
I know this feeling all too well–I’ve experienced it at several points in my career, and I’ve witnessed other people wrestle with their own lack of purpose in every organization I’ve worked in. I know how debilitating it can feel (as well as how costly it can be to an organization and its culture) when a huge number of people are disengaged from their current work but don’t know what they want instead, nor what to do about it.
More than anything, I appreciate how people are realizing that they want more from their work. Our entire society is growing…
There have been so many times in the past where I felt stuck and didn’t reach out for help. I didn’t know who to go to. Oftentimes I wasn’t even clear on what my problem was. I didn’t know what I needed.
That uncertainty led me to worry that there might not be a solution. Or worse, that I’d eventually open up and uncover something really ugly and upsetting that I didn’t know was inside me.
Both outcomes seemed too embarrassing and too exhausting to fathom. Both were based on the assumption that there was something seriously wrong with me.
I spent this past weekend in Ojai, California — a peaceful town north of Los Angeles — celebrating an old friend’s wedding.
On the drive up to Ojai, we wandered into a restaurant and found ourselves standing underneath an immense mural that read:
You can close your eyes to the things you don’t want to see, but you cannot close your heart to the things you do not want to feel.
These words struck a chord with me.
They spoke to something that I have learned after years of self-reflection and supporting the personal growth of my coaching clients: